POEM - Sordid Sinew

When you ghosted, I buried my own bones

in another woman’s spirited mouth

And she sucked every ounce

of love I felt for you

from this heart of mine…

for a time

  

I likely could have moaned your full name

while drowning out whatever response

might have come into her throat,

and she’d still have been happy

to hold me afterward

How strange, then,

that all I ever wanted her to be…

was you

  

“I’m not going to fuck the two of you,

if that’s what you’re thinking.”

The thought never even crossed my mind

I was saying goodnight to my soulmate

You were secretly saying goodbye

And compared to all the poor decisions

I’d made, while only half-considering

that you wouldn’t wait forever,

your choice was essentially perfect…

perfectly painful

  

The only thing you could have done

to hurt me more would be to die

So, as we spin our feeble flames

nearer again to the other

on this same old collision course

with the sun

—surrounded by death and disease—

thanks are what I owe you…

for not yet being dead

  

When she ghosted, I buried our blood,

then lay what was left of my flesh

on the tissuey topsoil

But nothing ended as a result

Instead, you slowly came back to me;

first, in the form of inimitable flowers,

and eventually as a voice

outside of my head

It all sounds so ugly when put on paper,

but I hope it makes you beam,

knowing all I can do is listen…

for now